Tag Archives: gentle and quiet spirit

Beauty Wins The Day

Christian Life, , ,

BEAUTY WINS THE DAY

What is beauty?

The people of the world focus on the visible beauty of shape, form and colour. Glossy magazines are full of pictures of beautiful women garbed in the latest of outrageous fashions. They spend huge amounts of money on draping and adorning their bodies with garments and makeup to enhance their visual attraction. When the body begins to show the inevitable sagging and bagging of age, they do whatever they can to reverse the process.

However, all this focus on their outward appearance and efforts to retain their youthful looks are of no account when their lives fall apart in the process. Outward beauty is too fragile and transient to sustain health and happiness. Many of them go from relationship to relationship, from husband to husband in an futile effort to find happiness, peace and contentment but beauty alone cannot hold people together.

What is true beauty?

Peter, in his first letter, gives us a glimpse into God’s definition of beauty. He is addressing wives of unbelieving husbands. What can they do to win their husbands to faith in Jesus? Some wives resort to a variety of tactics in an effort to persuade their husbands to turn to the Lord as they have done. Unfortunately, many of their tactics only succeed in antagonising, rather than winning them.

Peter says, “I know a sure-fire way to win your husbands without saying a word.”

Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behaviour of their wives (1 Pet. 3:1).

So, what is this secret weapon Peter encourages wives to use to win their husbands for the Lord?

Here comes the word again – beauty!

Is Peter saying, “Turn on the charm”? Or perhaps, “Make yourself as attractive as possible so that he will listen to you”? I don’t think so. It hasn’t worked before so why would you think it would work just because Peter said so. No, he has a far simpler way to impress your spouse so that he will listen to you.

Cultivate inner beauty!

You beauty should not come from outward adornment such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewellery or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight (1 Pet. 3:3).

A gentle and quiet spirit? Did you get that? God prizes a gentle and quiet spirit – no competition for power, no selfish I-want-my-own-way attitude, no pouting and sulking when I am crossed, no manipulating with words or moods. You know what I’m talking about.

What is a gentle and quiet spirit? Psa. 18:35 throws light on the meaning of gentleness.

“Thy gentleness hath made me great” (KJV) or “You stoop down to make me great” (NIV).

The Hebrew word for “gentleness” means clemency – the disposition to show forbearance, compassion, or forgiveness in judging or punishing; leniency; mercy.  (http://www.dictionary.com/browse/clemency – retrieved April 2016.

Most Bible translators use the word “gentleness” to translate the Hebrew. I love the older NIV’s use of the words “stoop down”. They give me the picture of the God who is great, high and lifted up, stooping down to my level to lift me up. That’s just what He did when He came to earth to be one of us.

The focus on external beauty, in the end, does nothing to foster harmonious relationships. In fact, most of the time it does the opposite because it focuses on self. However, when I willingly and deliberately stoop down in my spirit to show clemency – to be compassionate, forgiving and merciful to lift another up, we are drawn to one another, not alienated by selfish attitudes.

“Gentleness” pops up as the characteristic of a child of God in more than one place in Scripture. Jesus called people to follow Him, to take His yoke and learn from Him because, as He said, “I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls.” Did you get that? Gentleness produces rest, not strife both inside oneself and in one’s interaction with others.

How can we, who are naturally selfish and competitive, learn to be gentle, not vying for position and always wanting to be right, but stooping down to lift another up? There is only one way.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Gal. 5:22-23).

Gentleness is not a quality we can produce out of our old, sinful natures. It is a characteristic of the one who is led by the Holy Spirit. It is the outflow of His life, the nature of Jesus which He forms in us as we yield to Him, moment by moment.

Jesus explained to His disciples that greatness comes from serving others, not expecting to be served. The more we choose to serve instead of being served, the more gentle we will become, the Holy Spirit nurturing the very qualities in us that made Jesus great.

Do you want to be beautiful with a beauty that never fades with time? Work on your gentleness and, strangely enough, your outer beauty will reflect the inner, no matter how much time ravages your physical frame.

Scripture is taken from THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Have you read my first book, Learning to be a Son – The Way to the Father’s Heart (Copyright © 2015, Partridge Publishing)? You’ll love it!

ISBN: Softcover – 978-1-4828-0512-3,                                                                              eBook 978-4828-0511-6

Available on www.amazon.com in paperback, e-book or Kindle version, on www.takealot.com  or order directly from the publisher at www.partridgepublishing.com.

Do you like this post? Then buy your own copy of my book, Learning to be a Disciple, which is also available from www.amazon.com or www.takealot.com in South Africa. You can also order a copy directly from the publisher at www.partridgepublishing.com

Watch this space!

My latest book, The Heartbeat of Holiness, will also soon be available.

 

 

Wordless Witness

Bible Study, , ,

WORDLESS WITNESS

Wives, in the same way, submit yourselves to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behaviour of their wives when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes.

Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. (1 Peter 3: 1-6)

Peter, what are you asking? Once again he turned the standard of the world on its head!

It is well known that more women than men are inclined to respond to the gospel. How many spiritual ‘widows’ are there in churches all over the world? That means that homes are divided right down the middle over the fundamental issue of ‘who do you worship?’ People either worship the Creator God or they are self-made and worship their creator. This is the Great Divide between heaven and hell – not the hell of fire and brimstone but the hell of disunity which comes from divided loyalties.

How are wives meant to handle the situation, especially in the first century when women became unequally yoked with their husbands through faith in Jesus? This was not an unequal yoke by choice but by circumstances.

Paul warned believers about deliberately becoming involved in an unequal yoke with unbelievers:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? (2 Cor. 6: 14)

It’s one thing to make a foolish choice before marriage and then live to regret the consequences. It’s another to find the household split through one member’s decision to follow Jesus. What is a wife to do in such circumstances?

Peter’s counsel is both wise and productive. Many a wife in such a situation thinks that preaching to her husband is the way to go. Unfortunately, it seldom works that way. It usually has to opposite effect on an unbelieving husband. Remember that one who does not believe in Jesus is God’s enemy (Romans 5: 10). The more the wife bangs him with the Bible, the more resistant he becomes and the worse the conflict in the home.

Preaching won’t do it and dressing like a princess won’t do it either. Peter certainly did not advise Christian wives to dress like frumps! Perhaps she might even want to do that to get even with him or to turn him off physically when he doesn’t treat her with love.  Dressing up may arouse the husband’s sensual desires but it will not touch his heart. The wife may adorn herself outwardly to please her husband but it will bring him no nearer to believing in Jesus.

What kind of behaviour will break through his defences and touch his heart? The same kind of behaviour Peter counselled slaves to exhibit towards harsh and cruel slave-owners. Submit to him, whatever his demands until he recognises in you a supernatural grace that only God through His Spirit can produce. Preaching, dressing up or even resisting him will not do what a humble and gentle attitude will.

Jesus’s attitude and behaviour in the face of injustice brought life out of death. Imagine what a wife’s willing submission to her husband would do. If he were cruel or unreasonable, it would expose his wickedness against her purity of heart.

Peter’s counsel to believing wives is simple. Be like Sarah who willingly and quietly submitted to Abraham as head of the household. Be quiet and live it! Is that easy? No! Is it right? Yes! Why? Because God says it’s the way that works. It’s wisdom – doing what works.

The ways of the world and the ways of God’s kingdom are completely opposite to each other. The worldly way is to force other people to do what you want whether they like it or not. Use whatever it takes to make them do things your way. It may work by controlling your husband’s behaviour, but it only makes his heart harder and more resistant to the truth especially if you use the Bible as a weapon against him!

The kingdom’s way is to submit without a word, even if the demands are unjust. Absorb the wrong until the conscience of the wrongdoer is so activated that he is awakened to the truth through the example of his wife. You never know. He might just be won over by your being like Jesus. An example is better than a thousand words.

Scripture taken from THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.